Physician's prayer

Sir Dr. Robert Hutchison's Physician's Prayer
— written on the walls of Children's Hospital, London

" From inability to leave well enough alone,
From too much zeal for the new and contempt for what is old,
From putting knowledge before wisdom,
Science before art and cleverness before common sense,

From treating patients as cases, and from making the cure of the disease
more grievous than the endurance of the same.

Good Lord, deliver us."

More fun stories

Direct quote from the electronic medical record: "23-year-old male who was found in the parking lot of a store, waving a knife and screaming.  He has a history of drug use per an acquaintance at scene who quickly fled after giving that history.  He was brought in by ambulance combative, attempting to strike EMTs, and spitting.  Head net was then placed.  He was brought in under physical restraint with police officers assisting."

"30-year-old man who presented complaining of pain in his leg after being bit by a dog." I initially felt sorry for him, but on further review of the records, it seems that the dog that chased him down and bit him was a police dog in the act of its duty. No more sympathy.

Get bent

This is an unfortunate gentleman who had a previous femur fracture that got fixed with a rod down the middle of the bone. He got hit by a car a few years afterwards and bent the rod.